Tip 10 — How I Handled Revel’s Passage
Linda Fortune
Author of Regal: An Intimate View of One Magnificent FelineHow I Handled Revel’s Passage
Tip 10: Take time to prepare yourself by sharing your feelings.
Several tender moments stand out in my memory of my last days with Revel. Each of us can choose to be with our animal friends in whatever way that makes us feel the most comfortable and complete. And, spending this caring, meaningful time is important to both human and animal alike. Not only can we feel more complete and gain relief in sharing our feelings but it is also important to understand that the animal will receive and know the love in our hearts. How we spend this time is very important.
During the last week or so, I chose to feed Revel the very special foods that he seemed to especially enjoy. The ground beef was his favorite. We also spent quite a bit of time in the meditation room as I shared with him, in great detail, about how much I treasured him in my life. I remembered and shared all the memorable moments we had. We both benefited. I could tell he loved it there and so did I. He would lie against my chest and snuggle as I would say everything that I needed to say from my heart. I felt a lot of joy with the affirmed memories. My meditation mantra would play in the background. It seemed he would revel in the chanting, the physical closeness, and the love in my voice. I could see and feel his comfort in our closeness and the mantra gave me great comfort too.
Thankfully, a dear friend offered to drive Revel and I up to the vet’s office on the designated day. This was particularly important to me because I could hold Revel in my arms for his final journey. I placed my headphones on Revel’s head and was able to hold them in position so that he could hear the chanting of the mantra. He seemed to sway in concert with the chanting and I felt no tension or discomfort in his body whatsoever.
With the vet’s help, Revel passed peacefully as I continued my vigilant touch and the meditation mantra played in his ears. The ease at which he passed gave me some comfort and being able to be totally present was also comforting. I felt that I had done my duty. I was there with him to the end.
I then placed Revel in a container filled with his favorite toys and his blanket. I had prepared a spot in my back yard for his burial and placed him there. It felt good to have him there under the apple tree and close. Thankfully, a dear friend came by and I was able to cry being held in loving arms. I sobbed uncontrollably for a short while which released a great deal of emotion. As my tears subsided, I knew everything was/would be fine. I loved that Revel! We had shared 16 ½ years together and I rested in knowing that I had done right by him!
Next: Tip 11 and Regal’s Profound Impact on Me
With blessings, Linda
Filed under Understanding Pet Loss & Grief | Comment (0)Tip 9 –Preparation for Revel’s Passage
Linda Fortune
Author of Regal: An Intimate View of One Magnificent FelinePreparation for Revel’s Passage.
Tip 9: The passage of an animal friend affords us the opportunity to grow and act through love and tender care.
Welcome!
In the midst of all the wonderful feeling of connection as I cared Revel and Regal, I eventually had to come to terms with what was in their best interest and plan their passages. Never having been responsible for that part of the experience with any of my other pets when I was a child, I eventually sought practical advice from my vets, created my own ways of spending our last days together, and then relied upon my meditation practice for strength and guidance. During the course of these two experiences, I have grown in my ability to handle grieving, saying goodbye, and honoring the passage.
The hardest question for me to deal with was the issue of euthanasia. My upbringing raised a serious question about it. One day I was listening to a talk by my spiritual teacher. A reference was made to this issue and, although I cannot now remember exactly what was said, I do remember that I felt relief. It was a permission giving statement that allowed me to consider that option if it was in the best interest of my animal friend. I did not want any animal friend to suffer unnecessarily if that were the situation.
Well, that time did eventually come for Revel. Having become gradually blind, losing all control of his functions, and waiting probably about three weeks longer then recommended by the vet, I finally was able to make the decision to let Revel go. This was one of the hardest decisions that I had ever made and I had resisted the advice of my vet for a number of days. I finally was able muster the courage for the benefit of Revel.
Next Entry: Tip 10 and How I Handled Revel’s passage.
With blessings, Linda
Filed under Understanding Pet Loss & Grief | Comment (0)Tip 8 –Intense and Emotional Passages
Linda Fortune
Author of Regal: An Intimate View of One Magnificent FelineIntense and Emotional Passages
Tip 8: Some passages can be especially emotional and difficult because of the deep bond and love between an animal and their human.
Welcome!
Due to the many years of living together in the intimate place called home, I got very close to both Revel and Regal. We were constant companions whether at home or traveling in the RV. It was only natural that coping with Revel and then Regal’s passages proved to be much more intense and emotional then my earlier childhood losses. Not only enjoying them during their playful years, I lived with them through their aging process. Being their primary nurse and caretaker as they aged and developed their own health issues, our relationships became even deeper, more intimate, and filled with still more love during these important and meaningful times.
Both their passages brought deep grief and, thankfully, friends let me express my emotions and understood the intensity of my feelings. They, too, are all animal lovers and have experienced the same kind of grief. I’m sure that those of you who are reading this blog know exactly what I am talking about. You’ve been there and have felt the pain of loss too.
Thankfully, we all do recover with the help of time. Then, hopefully, we open our hearts once again to the joy of an animal friend and the unconditional love they bring us. I’ve often wondered if that is not their ultimate purpose in coming – to help us keep our hearts open and teach us about unconditional love. Anyway, that’s why we feel their loss so deeply.
I feel so enriched by what my all animal teachers have given me during their lives and then for what they have taught me about grief and loss through their passing. We can all be so grateful for our animal presences in my lives despite the difficult parts.
Next entry: Tip 9 and Preparation for Revel’s passage
With blessings, Linda
Filed under Understanding Pet Loss & Grief | Comment (0)